


for a little while, i am fine

by vangoghstars



Series: we are not alive (seer!ranboo au) [2]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Ghosts, Bittersweet, Dream Team SMP Spoilers, Phil is Not Tommy's Dad, Ranboo Angst (Video Blogging RPF), Ranboo is a seer, Ranboo-centric (Video Blogging RPF), Twitch Chat Appearance, we are working with dsmp canon relationships only here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-23
Updated: 2021-02-23
Packaged: 2021-03-14 08:43:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,731
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29664717
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vangoghstars/pseuds/vangoghstars
Summary: Ranboo can see ghosts. It is something he's learning to live with.--4 times Ranboo tells someone he can see ghosts
Relationships: Karl Jacobs & Ranboo, Ranboo & Technoblade & Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Ranboo & Toby Smith | Tubbo & TommyInnit, Ranboo & Wilbur Soot
Series: we are not alive (seer!ranboo au) [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2173188
Comments: 30
Kudos: 599
Collections: Completed stories I've read





	for a little while, i am fine

**Author's Note:**

> hi!
> 
> holy cow i did not expect the first part of this to blow up the way it did. thank u so so much for the support it truly means the absolute world to me. by very popular request, i now present part 2, which is the bittersweet comfort section of the hurt from part 1. this one got a lot longer than i thought it would, but i really enjoyed writing it
> 
> thank u so much to @Cookie Cuddler who came up with the idea for Techno and Phil's reval!
> 
> i put it in the tags but just to be clear Phil is NOT Tommy's dad! i am operating w dsmp canon relationships so only Wilbur and Phil are related. Tommy is just a friend of Wil's, so please don't come into the comments being like why doesn't phil care as much abt tommy 
> 
> lmk if u guys want a part 3 bc i have something in mind for it :D 
> 
> once again, the title is from Home by AURORA (as is the title of this series), and my twitter is @izzyhangout if u wanna come chat

It is Ghostbur who finds him. 

They don’t know each other well- Ranboo never met Wilbur when he was alive (aside from the angry broken man that trails Tommy), and Ghostbur spends most of his time with Phil and Fundy. 

Ranboo is nobody to Ghostbur. This is something he’s learned to accept.

Regardless, it is Ghostbur who finds him when Ranboo wakes up teetering on the edge of the cavern that used to be L’Manberg. He thinks if the ghost didn’t reach out and grab him he would have fallen right in. 

“Ranboo?” Ghostbur asks quietly. “Wha- what are you doing here?”

“I don’t know,” Ranboo breathes out. He won’t cry again; the tear tracks from last night haven’t stopped burning yet. 

“That’s okay,” Ghostbur says. He sits Ranboo down on the ledge. “Sometimes I don’t remember either.”

Ranboo wonders for a moment what it would be like to be like Ghostbur, to just give up on memory altogether and live each day anew. And then he remembers the way Tommy and Phil look at Ghostbur when they think nobody's looking, all that longing and pain behind their eyes. 

He thinks he could never do that to Techno and Phil, not that he’s sure they’d care all that much.

“Yeah,” Ranboo says, voice as soft and light as he can make it. He doesn’t want to treat Ghostbur like a child, not the way that Dream so effortlessly does, but dear  _ god _ Ranboo would give anything to be as small as possible right now. 

“You know, we’re alike, you and I,” Ghostbur says. He takes a seat next to Ranboo, and his feet dangle into the abyss below. “We both keep losing time.”

“What do you mean?” Ranboo asks. He feels as if he’s been punched hard, the breath knocked right out of him. 

“You lose the time you spend sleepwalking. Techno says he watches you leave the house at night.” Ghostbur laughs at this, low and a little bit harsh. Ranboo forces out half a smile. 

“And you?” Ranboo prompts. 

“I’m tied to a fading place. There is no more L’Manberg; all her citizens have left. And soon, there will be no more need for me.”

Ranboo understands more than anyone, and somehow Ghostbur has recognized that. Ghostbur is a memory fading away in the wind and time, slipping through minds and the grass that blows around the crater. He likes things others find trivial, like blue sheep and mushroom stew and cobblestone. He doesn’t belong in a world of war, and the world will soon realize that. 

Ranboo is born in a time of peace and thrown into war because he thinks that is what’s best for him. He is wrong, of course, but it is too late when he realizes that, and he’s made a name for himself among the world of Hypixel. The battles are fierce and scary, but they don’t last long, and that’s what he’s most thankful for. 

It is the length of the wars here in Dream’s land, the painstaking process of keeping track who is on what side, that is hard for him. Fighting was always easy. 

“Ah,” Ranboo responds because he’s not sure what else to say. “I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry too,” Ghostbur says, and Ranboo turns to look at him. Ghostbur’s eyes are twinkling slightly, and he leans in to whisper like he’s letting Ranboo in on a secret. “I know you see them,” he whispers. 

Ranboo jumps back, eyes snapping down. Everything expands and collapses all at once. 

“I- I don’t-” For a moment, Ranboo tries to deflect. “They’re loud,” he settles on instead. 

“Death is loud,” Ghostbur says. “That’s where most people get it wrong.”

“Techno’s and Phil’s ghosts like you,” Ranboo offers the budding silence. “They get all excited when you show up.”

Ghostbur smiles softly at that. “They like you too. Always going on about ‘Ranboo pog’ and ‘protect Ranboo’. It’s a nice change from Tommy’s.”

Ranboo expected that the two Wilburs, one a manifestation of a young man’s dream of independence and the other a violent and disgruntled spirit bound to a kid forever, wouldn’t get along. They’re far too different and far too similar. “If you mention L’Manberg he’ll go all quiet, which at least gets him to stop fighting with the goat guy for a couple minutes.”

“Ah,” Ghostbur says, looking up at the stars peeking out over the horizon. The days move by too fast. “Schlatt  _ really _ doesn’t like me.”

“You’re not missing much,” Ranboo smiles. “He mostly just whines about missing his nation.”

Ghostbur tilts his head slightly as if in deep thought. Ranboo wonders where the ghost goes when he’s not lounging around Techno’s base or keeping tabs on Tommy. 

“I think we are just made for different things,” Ghostbur responds finally. Ranboo doesn’t ask whether Ghostbur is referring to Wilbur or Schlatt. He finds it doesn’t matter. “I’m what they  _ want _ L’Manberg’s legacy to be, and he’s what the legacy really is. L’Manberg was where hope went to die.”

“Wow,” Ranboo, who has spent the last couple minutes trying not to think about what that meant for him when he dies, responds. “That was… a lot.”

Ghostbur offers a smile in return and presses some blue into Ranboo’s hand. “You should tell Techno and Phil,” Ghostbur says. “They’ll know what to do.”

“Maybe,” Ranboo sighs. He stares into the crater below, the red vines of the egg covering almost the entirety of the bottom. 

When he looks up, Ghostbur is gone. 

\--

He does not tell Techno and Phil first. 

Actually, the whole thing is a rather laughable and ridiculous accident, and it would be extremely funny if Ranboo wasn’t very nearly on the verge of a panic attack. 

It happens because he’s tired and grumpy and unwell. He had woken up in his basement for some reason, each hand grasping an empty map despite him having put those same empty maps in his hands when he went to bed upstairs in his house last night. On top of that, he’s got a pounding headache, and he hasn’t hydrated nearly enough, and a creeper blew a hole in his yard he still needs to fix. 

He’s heading to Dream SMP to get some dirt, because he’s run out of fucking  _ dirt _ of all things, and he doesn’t want to start griefing Techno’s lawn, when he runs into Karl. 

This time, Karl’s tailed by a man and a woman. The man wears a white shirt and a brown vest, his moustache twitching as he argues with the woman. She’s in a bikini, for some reason, and is executing the most painful mix of bright flashing images and loud screeches Ranboo has ever experienced. And Ranboo’s tired; he’s so very tired. 

It goes like this: 

Karl is walking towards him on the prime path. Karl’s headed somewhere opposite him, probably towards the nether portal or maybe to the egg. Ranboo is just trying to get some dirt, and these two idiot ghosts trailing Karl are so loud. 

“Hiya, Ranboo!” Karl says. 

“Will you  _ shut up _ !” Ranboo responds. 

Karl goes deadly still for a painful second. “Jeez, dude. I’m sorry,” Karl says softly.

“Wait- I mean no, not- Karl, I’m-”

“It’s okay.” Karl is too kind and too reassuring. It feels suffocating. “I know I can be a bit… much.”

“No, Karl- it’s not- it’s not you. They’re just- so loud…” The two ghosts stop squabbling to stare blankly at Ranboo. The woman’s golden wings ruffle angrily behind her. 

“Are you- are you okay, Ranboo?” Karl asks. The ghosts have gone back to fighting now. Images of a gathering in the center of a small cozy village flash. 

“Can you ask them to stop?” Ranboo’s never directly intervened with any ghosts before. There are so many ways this could go.

“Huh?” Karl asks. He seems lost, uncomfortable, out of his element. Ranboo feels the same way. 

“The, uh- they’ll stop if you tell them to. They respect you.”

“...Okay?” Karl says, unsure. “Can you stop?” It’s directed outwards, a little up towards the sky perhaps, and completely in the opposite direction of the ghosts. It shuts them up all the same. 

“Thank you,” Ranboo breathes out into the new silence. 

“Can I-” Karl starts tentatively. “Can I ask about that?”

Ranboo figures if anyone deserves an explanation, it’s Karl. “Yes.”

“Who did I get to be quiet?”

“I don’t know their names,” Ranboo replies. “They’re uh… well, they seem to hate each other. It’s two people today, a man and a woman. The man’s wearing, like, victorian clothes? Big dark mustache and a large red necklace. The woman is wearing literally just a bikini.”

Karl blinks rapidly. He looks dumbfounded to say the least. “How in the world do you know about them? You shouldn’t- you shouldn’t be able to know that.”

“They’re uh- they- well- I can see ghosts.” The dead silence that follows isn’t exactly unexpected, but it hurts in a way that makes Ranboo barrel right through it. “You have a lot of them, and they hang out around you a lot, and these ones are a lot louder than the others- usually they just hang out in groups and walk around behind you- the pink-haired guy in the mask with the tall friend is  _ really creepy _ by the way-”

“Don’t talk to him,” Karl says. Any humor has completely drained out of his voice. “Not him. Any of the others are fine, but not him.”

“Yeah,” Ranboo agrees. He can still see it in his mind’s eye, Karl wrapped up in those blood vines. “They don’t like you very much.” 

“He killed me once, I think. I can’t remember why, though.” 

“Oh,” Ranboo says. “Sorry.”

“Oh it’s cool!” Karl responds. “I’ve never actually told anyone about that before.”

“Not even Quackity and Sapnap?” 

“I couldn’t.” Karl fidgets with his sweater cuffs. “I couldn’t do that to them.”

“I don’t think you would be doing anything to them if you did,” Ranboo says. He thinks they are similar, two people running from the truth. “Sometimes it’s nice to not carry a burden alone.”

Karl smiles softly. “Thank you, Ranboo.” Ranboo knows that Karl will think about what he said. 

“Of course, Karl. I’ll… see you around.”

“See ya,” Karl says. He starts to walk down the prime path, and Ranboo spends a moment watching him go. 

Just before he dips out of earshot, Karl turns. 

“By the way,” he says, eyes sparkling. “The two you were talking about are named Jimmy and Helga. They’re married.”

Helga gives Ranboo a wickedly sharp grin. 

\--

Telling Tommy and Tubbo is hard. He expects it to be, because their ghosts are just so personal, but it’s painful in ways he never thought it would be. 

He sits them both down in Snowchester on a day Tommy has off from working on the hotel. He drags Tubbo away from whatever he’s currently trying to build, and Tubbo complains about it a whole bunch but comes willingly anyway. 

He contemplates how to ease them into it, which person to tackle first. Is it easier to tell Tommy he’s being haunted by his dead brother or Tubbo that the old tyrant of Manberg is still around in some form? He decides it’s best to be gentle about this, to describe as little as possible until they’re ready to hear more. 

“I can see ghosts,” he says instead. There goes subtlety.

Tommy starts laughing as Wilbur sends him a bunch of angry flashes of red. Schlatt stirs from whatever momentary rest he was trying to get when Wilbur starts to screech, sending his own angry flashes of nothing in particular Ranboo’s way. 

It is Tubbo who shushes Tommy, who waits patiently for Ranboo to continue. 

“A lot of people around here have them,” Ranboo says. “Karl, Techno, and Phil all have like, a  _ ton _ .” He doesn’t talk about Dream’s ghosts. He’s not sure if it’s for Tommy and Tubbo’s sake or for his own. 

“Do we have any?” Tommy asks. 

“Why would we have any?” Tubbo responds. “We’ve never killed anyone.”

Schlatt’s ears fluff up angrily. 

“You do, actually,” Ranboo butts in. “They’re not too happy with me right now.”

Wilbur makes a noise between a screech and a huff. 

“Pogchamp!” Tommy shouts. “I’ve always wanted my own ghost.”

“Not this one,” Ranboo chuckles. “You wouldn’t like this one.”

“Why not?” Tubbo asks. Schlatt and Wilbur exchange angry looks. 

“Both of you- well- your-” There’s no easy way to do this. 

Ranboo takes a deep breath, steadies himself. “Your ghosts are Wilbur and Schlatt.”

Tommy and Tubbo go deathly still. For a moment, no one breathes. 

“Schlatt?” Tubbo whispers, grabbing desperately at Tommy’s hand. 

“Hate to break it to you, big guy,” Tommy says. “But everyone can see Ghostbur.”

“No-” Ranboo says faster than he can stop himself. “It’s not- it’s not Ghostbur. It’s Wilbur. Like, the Wilbur from the Pogtopia stories.” 

“What the fuck are you trying to do here, exactly?’ Tommy says. There’s rage building behind his eyes, and Wilbur’s still busy trying to communicate god knows what to Ranboo. 

“Nothing! Nothing, I promise!”

“How do we know you’re not lying?” Tubbo says. It’s the first time Ranboo’s seen Tubbo edge this close to violence. His ears flick down in the same way Schlatt’s do.

“Well- I mean I-” Wilbur throws Ranboo about ten different images all at once that end up a jumbled mess in his mind. “Wilbur,” Ranboo says, directing his eyes over Tommy’s shoulder to meet the ghost. “If you want me to tell Tommy something, you’re going to have to slow down.”

That stops Tommy altogether, whose hands start to wobble slightly. 

Wilbur screeches softer this time before sending two clear images. 

The first is of Tommy dressed in his white and red baseball tee with a harness wrapped around his shoulders and a green bandana around his neck. The second is of a diamond block embedded in a stone wall. 

Ranboo turns his attention back to the kid. “He wants to- I don’t really know what this means, but he showed me a diamond block?”

Tommy crumples to the ground sobbing. 

Tubbo rushes over to comfort his friend, and Schlatt drifts over to peer down at the two. He sneers and sends Ranboo an image of a firework being fired at Tubbo’s head. So that’s fun. 

“I- I’m sorry,” Ranboo says as quietly as he can. 

“It’s alright, big guy,” Tubbo responds, looking up to meet Ranboo’s towering form. Ranboo bends awkwardly down to their height, the fabric around his knees surely being stained by the grass underneath. “It’s not like you chose this.”

He didn’t. He thinks if he was ever given a choice, he wouldn’t have chosen this. 

Ranboo gets another few flashes of images from Wilbur, who has sat down next to Tommy, his long trench coat spread out around him. “He misses you, Tommy,” Ranboo interprets. “He keeps showing me images of Pogtopia.” He gets a very vivid image of Tommy stuck between two pistons, which makes him snort. “Did you really try decorating with pistons and redstone blocks?”

Tommy lets out a weak and watery chuckle. “Where is he, Ranboo?”

“On your left,” Ranboo says. 

Tommy reaches out a hand, palm flat. Wilbur meets him there. 

\--

He promises he intends to tell Techno and Phil. 

It’s just that the timing always seems wrong. Between Techno collecting resources for some secret project, Phil remodelling his house, and their constant trips to random ocean monuments, there’s really not much time for Ranboo to just toss them a casual “Hey by the way I see ghosts! Anyway have a good night!”

It’s their third mission to an ocean monument, and Phil’s leading them through the nether roof back home. Chat’s been a flurry of “Ranboo pog”s and “SnoopPls”s since Ranboo took down three of the Elder Guardians before (what the heck is a Snoop anyway?), and Techno’s ghosts have followed their lead with many a “Ranboo!” floating around Techno’s shoulders. 

They don’t have much to talk about from their personal lives. Ranboo can’t remember half of what happens when he’s not around Techno and Phil, and the two older members of the group are reluctant to share anything with Ranboo, let alone intimate details about their days. 

Techno chats idly about being Ranboo’s sensei, a running joke neither of them seem to have had the heart to let go of yet. Ranboo is bold enough to admit he likes it, but not quite bold enough to admit that to Techno’s face. 

Phil lets out a particularly loud giggle from the front of the group, doubling over with laughter after Techno cracks yet another joke about dying soon to give Ranboo a tragic backstory. 

As Techno starts to laugh along, the word “TECHNOADOPT” appears bold and big off to his right. He plays it off subtly, something Ranboo wouldn’t notice if he couldn’t see the ghosts, but not before the rest of the ghosts join in. 

A flurry of “Technodad” and “Technoprotect” and even a couple “Ranboo brother”s appear around Techno. 

Chat, Phil’s ghosts, seem to have the same idea, sending up a stream of “Dadza”s crowning Phil’s bucket hat. 

“Wow,” Ranboo says, not even thinking about it. “They really want you guys to adopt me, huh?”

Both Techno and Phil round on him. Chat and Techno’s ghosts go wild, a frenzy of “how???” and “Ranboo????” 

“Heh?” Techno asks, trying for casual and hitting closer to nervous. 

“Uh-” Ranboo is desperately trying to save the situation. 

“Is your-” Phil starts to ask Techno.

“Yeah,” Techno interrupts, as in-sync with Phil as always. “They’re all shouting protect and whatever.”

“Mine too,” Phil says. “But Ranboo, mate, how did  _ you _ know that?”

“I can- I mean they’re not really, but for some reason they count- I can kind of see your voices?”

“Heh?” Techno repeats. Ranboo’s gonna need to figure out a better explanation.

“They’re, like, one of those word cloud things. They kind of float around you two just writing out weird things all the time. Techno’s is spamming E again right now.” 

Techno just blinks at him. 

“I can see ghosts,” Ranboo continues. “I guess Chat and the voices count enough to be considered part of the category.” 

Phil nods. “That must suck.”

“I mean, not always,” Ranboo says, a hand coming up to tug lightly on his own hair. “Your ghosts are pretty nice. Karl’s are okay when they’re not being outrageously loud.”

“Karl’s got ghosts?” Phil asks. He sounds surprised more than upset, which is an emotion Ranboo can handle. 

“Yeah,” Ranboo explains. “Tons. All different types and from everywhere. Most of them are docile, except the masked ones.” 

“So then how does Ghostbur work?” Techno half demands, confused and toeing the line of upset. 

“Well, Ghostbur is the ghost of L’Manberg itself. He’s the physical representation of the spirit of the country, so he’s tied to a lot more than just one person on this server. He stays away from the other ghosts mostly, though. Especially-”

He falls silent, remembers who he’s standing by. 

He hadn’t been there when Phil murdered his son that sunny day in November. He’d only heard of it through the stories, how Wilbur had begged for death and Phil had relented, how Phil had tried to fulfill his son’s last wish. 

“Especially who?” Techno presses. 

Ranboo really doesn’t want to say. He figures he probably should anyway. “Wilbur.”

Phil’s face collapses. The color drains out of it instantly. Techno lays a hand out on Phil’s shoulder, disrupting a cloud of “killza”s that sit there. 

“Wilbur?” Phil parrots back at him. 

“Wilbur,” Ranboo prepeats. “Like, the one from Pogtopia. With all his memories and everything.” 

It is silent. The sounds of the nether drone on. 

“I’m sorry, Phil,” Ranboo adds. 

“I’d like to speak to him,” Phil says eventually through shaky breaths. “If that’s okay.”

“He’s uh- He’s Tommy’s ghost, so you’ll have to ask him.”

Phil sighs. They walk the rest of the way home in silence. 

To everyone’s surprise, Tommy agrees. 

Tommy and Phil are barely on speaking terms, not close by any means, and Ranboo feels more like a therapist than a friend when sitting them down together in Phil’s house. 

The silence is stiff. 

“He, uh-” Ranboo says, trying to break the growing dread building in his stomach. “He’ll show up in a second.”

They wait. Phil makes them tea. 

Ranboo’s just taking his first sip of the nice warm chamomile when he gets violently smacked with the image of Phil driving a sword, sharp and bright blue, through Wilbur’s stomach. 

“Wow, okay. Holy cow,” Ranboo says, desperately trying not to spill any of the tea. “Hi, Wilbur.”

Wilbur raises his head from his position on the armrest. 

“Hi, Will,” Phil says, eyes directed towards where he thinks Ranboo is looking. He’s a little too far to the left, but it doesn’t really matter. 

Wilbur sends a flash of warm arms and the sound of a child laughing.

“He sends a hug,” Ranboo translates. “I think he’s reminiscing?”

“I miss you, Will,” Phil smiles. “We all do.” Tommy nods along in agreement. 

Wilbur sends another image of a winged Phil holding him, the two of them flying high off the ground. It’s followed quickly by a flurry of question marks and a few images of the wings. 

“He wants to know where your wings are,” Ranboo says. 

Phil stiffens slightly. “I lost them, Will. In the explosion.”

Wilbur screeches. Ranboo flinches. 

“He- he’s not happy about that,” Ranboo says. “Guilt.” 

“No, no. Will,” Phil says softly. “It wasn’t your fault. I should have been there for you sooner.”

There is only silence from Wilbur. The ghost extends a hand slowly towards Phil. 

“Oh,” Ranboo says. “He, uh- Can I have your hand, Phil?”

“Sure, mate,” Phil says, extending his hand towards Ranboo. 

Ranboo guides Phil’s hand into Wilbur’s, who immediately grabs Phil’s hand. Phil can’t feel the weight, but he cries all the same. 

“He misses you,” Ranboo says. “He loves you.”

“I know,” Phil responds. “I love him too.”

Phil takes Tommy and Ranboo’s hands and brings them into his, into their strange little family at the end of the world. 

Together, they mourn.


End file.
